I am always bullied in school and at home. I am the eldest child, and my six-year-old brother always bullies me because I do not want to play with him.

In school, I am a prefect but many students do not respect me. They bully me and make fun of me because I am different from the other girls. They even make fun of my sister, and call me “gay” even though I am not. I feel hurt when they make fun of me and I call them “stupid”, “idiot”, “sucker”, and “sakai”.

They beat me sometimes and I beat them back. When I report them to my teachers, they are not bothered. Sometimes, they hide my stuff, and I have to borrow my friend’s things instead. At the end of the day, they give it back to me.

Once, I accidentally left my pencil case in school. When I went back the next day, my pencil case was torn inside. I got mad and started to curse loudly in class.

I have a very bad temper and I cannot control it. My friends tend to run away from me sometimes. When I ask them why, they always reply “nothing”, which makes me feel really angry.

I told them to tell the truth because I do not like people lying to me. It is better if they tell me the truth so I can become a better person.

I used to go to a counsellor but I stopped. When my friends found out that I went to a counsellor, they started calling me “psycho”, “crazy” and “mental”. And they always humiliate me in public and in front of my teachers. I do not trust any of my friends at all.

Sometimes they’re so good to me, offering me money when I forget to bring my wallet, helping me up when I fall down, but most of the time, they’re really bad to me. I feel so frustrated and I do not know what to do. — Bullied

Faridah
I have to tell you something that you may not WANT to hear, but that you NEED to hear. I believe that while you may be facing some problems in school, you are seeing more to the matter than there is.

Everyone is most interested in themselves, including the bullies. The thing about bullies is that they pick on those whom they think are easy targets.

You have two choices – ignore them or stand up to them. It’s hard when people call you names, but remember that only weak people bully. It is they who have low self-esteem, and they are only brave when they are in a crowd. They don’t have courage when they are alone.

Find a small group of friends that you can hang out with because when you are with a group of friends, people are less likely to bully you. You need to build up your own self-confidence and the best way to do that is to take up some self-defense classes like karate or tae-kwon-do. When you feel emotionally and physically stronger, your self-confidence will keep the bullies away.

Shaiful
You are a prefect in school and also the eldest child, and these positions give you a certain authority. Learn to start asserting that authority, starting from dealing with your six-year-old brother at home.

School can be a cruel place for teenagers, especially when teachers do nothing to deal with bullying.

You can talk to your parents about your problem, and convince them to speak to your school’s counsellors or discipline teachers.

Perhaps being a victim of constant bullying is making your temper worse. But all the aggression you display – whatever your aggravations are – will only push your friends away from you.

For now, ignore the baseless name-calling and whatever else those “friends” of yours have to say.

See your school counsellor and seek help; they are trained to help you deal with problems like bullying.

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